Ayanna Fabio, Mother of BMU client (Inayah Jackson)

“In late summer of 2019 my daughter came to me and told me she was pregnant. Although she was already an adult, she was only 20, with no job, no driver’s license and was not equipped to care for a child. She had returned home from college and was still deciding her future. This was not in the plan. I panicked, quietly of course. As a black mother, I knew what she was facing. She needed the village. I also knew that as a soon to be grandmother, I needed the village. I spent a career working in my community, so I started by finding the resources that I often referred my clients to. I called several groups and got no response. I remembered a presentation I attended on Black Mother’s United and decided I would call. My call was answered quickly by Ms. Toni Johnson. I explained to her that my daughter needed assistance. That I wanted the chance to support her and become a grandmother without being her one and only resource. I wanted her to be able to be guided, educated, and empowered on her own. I wanted to keep my position as her mother, and not become her case manager. Ms. Toni heard me and understood. I talked with my daughter and encouraged her to call Ms. Toni and sign herself up for the program. She was comforted to know that there was already someone waiting for her call.

Ms. Toni didn’t waste no time! She came into our family like a breath of fresh air. My daughter quickly and easily bonded and trusted her. I was working full time and caring for her younger sibling with special needs, so Ms. Toni was able to transport Inayah to pre-natal appointments when needed. This was so relieving for me. I was able to enjoy the phone calls when my daughter would tell me about her visit. Ms. Toni signed her up for various pregnancy education classes. She was able to sit in a room with other soon to be black moms and talk, laugh and connect. She really enjoyed this; I know because I always got calls from her excited about all the new information she was learning. I could share with her my experiences which supported what she was learning.

The most valuable piece was that Ms. Toni was present in the pre-natal appointments to help her advocate for herself and her baby. I have had negative experiences during my own pregnancy and even lost a baby due to inadequate prenatal care. I wasn’t sure if I could help advocate for her properly due to my own trauma. Ms. Toni came through and showed up at the first ultra-sound and every one after. Ms. Toni also made sure to emphasize the importance of connecting with mental health services and she made sure my daughter was connected to counseling when needed. While the father was present at this time, I was most concerned with my daughter being able to see the support she had in case she needed to go through this on her own.

I cannot list all the help and services that Ms. Toni provided because it was so many. Every step of the way, Ms. Toni plugged in a resource, provided support, or just provided a listening ear. It was natural, it was genuine, it was in the very nature as us black women do. I talked to Ms. Toni like a high school girlfriend. She had my daughters back like extended family. We worked together, sometimes tag teaming if needed, all to prepare my young Black Queen to take her thrown and become a mother. On, Feb 27, 2020 the village bells rang and my grandbaby was on her way.

My daughter was admitted into the hospital only a few weeks before the Pandemic hit. Luckily both her father and I along with her boyfriend were able to attend the birth. Ms. Toni came in and coached her through the entire delivery. Ms. Toni had helped them prepare their birthing plan and it went smooth and seamless. A healthy beautiful baby girl was born! While we prepared for life with a new baby in the family, the world began to shut down. We stayed sheltered in our homes unable to connect with each other. Ms. Toni stayed connected by phone and zoom. She made sure my new Grandbaby was connected to a pediatrician and that my daughter had her follow up care. After receiving career assistance my daughter entered a Dental Assistant program with hopes to someday become a dentist. She was confident and empowered. Ms. Toni continued to make sure that my daughter attended the “Mommy mingle” groups. She continued to give resources and referrals well past her discharge date. Many programs in my community extended their connections as they saw that families were in crisis during this time. Ms. Toni was still checking in when my daughter’s boyfriend became incarcerated. This was a blow to our family as we scrambled to support this now single mother. Ms. Toni was quick to refer her to no-cost therapy even providing the transportation. She also shared childcare, diaper/clothing, and housing resources. I watched my daughter continue with her education and her mental wellness through it all. She enrolled her daughter in Early Head Start and had secured childcare. My granddaughter was thriving, reaching, and exceeding all of her developmental milestones. Black Mothers United had given her the tools she needed to be an empowered Black Mother. When this young woman needed the village, Black Mother’s United answered and exceeded the call! We are eternally grateful.”